1 When it is a sign of emulation: NO
Why immediately dramatize? “The expression losing one's temper can cover a wide spectrum of situations”, reframes Stéphane Trichet from the outset. This coach and company speaker thus describes common situations where stressed employees could lose their usual calm. “Contrary to popular belief, stress is not only counterproductive and paralyzing: it is also a natural adaptation of the body to a situation that can lead to additional motivation. Example of a situation: an employee who is suddenly feverish, who doubts and manifests mood swings more or less pleasant for those around him. But this specialist is keen to distinguish this occasional stress from genuine chronic anxiety. “Sometimes you have to accept to work in a situation of moderate stress because you need a little excitement to be successful,” he explains. Up to a certain level, losing your temper allows you to be effective. ”
“When faced with someone losing their temper, it's tempting to step up and turn the incident into a conflict.”
2 When it's all the time and with everyone: YES
Certainly, but the coach agrees: everything is a question of measurement … “There is of course a level not to cross, continues Stéphane Trichet. Beyond a certain stage, stress really turns into anxiety. The employee can start to be tired, prisoner of his emotions and poison the lives of his colleagues. »Classic situation: a regularly angry employee who unloads his emotions on those around him. “It is the manager's role to identify the first signs. Even if the employee notices it, he will often not dare to say anything for fear that it is interpreted as a sign of weakness. On the contrary, he will push as far as possible to see how far he can go. “”Losing your temper often means finding yourself in a situation of uneasiness at work without necessarily being able to identify it,” observes François Delpierre, head of the Occupational Risk Prevention division at Securex. Among the classic symptoms: an employee who appears more and more tired and who adopts a negative, cynical, even feverish attitude. “Somewhere, this employee, perhaps close to burn-out, waves his arms to be heard. But if he does not notice it and if his manager does nothing, he risks depression if he does not consult … ”
3 When you let go with a caring manager: NO
Losing your temper, yes … but not with just anyone. “Losing your cool can be positive,” says Pascal Christin, coach at CSP Formation. If only the actors involved are able to take a step back from the situation. According to this company speaker, however, the exercise is delicate and requires two important conditions. “Ideally, the person concerned must already realize this and have enough lucidity to recognize his excesses. He may say to himself “I lost my temper but what exactly did I want to free myself from?” This expert insists on the liberating aspect of the situation. But the manager must still be alert and above all benevolent. “He must already know that someone who loses his temper releases his stress. Then, the manager is free to see the situation as a fault or a signal. Because when you lose your temper, it's because you often have no other way to show your moods. »Example of a delicate but liberating situation: an employee who insults his manager with a flowery vocabulary. “Ideally the manager should start by saying ‘Now that you've insulted me what do you really want to say to me?' By saying this, he breaks the emotional charge and engages in dialogue. This does not prevent, secondly, to recall that these words were unacceptable but to start again on a better basis. ”
4 If the manager reacts badly: YES
Except that not all managers will always be so well intentioned. “Even without wanting to harm the employee, many managers do not know how to do in this kind of situation and let the employee lock himself in his discomfort, recognizes François Delpierre. Many fail in their duty to listen, alert and question. Pascal Christin agrees. “When faced with someone who loses their temper, it is often tempting to go overboard and turn the incident into a conflict. Another option: the Labor Code authorizes the manager to be procedural, especially if the incident took place in front of witnesses. “An insult, isolated from its context, can be interpreted as a serious fault and cause the employee a warning or even dismissal. Sometimes losing your temper can be very costly. ”
1 When it is a sign of emulation: NO
Why immediately dramatize? “The expression losing one's temper can cover a wide spectrum of situations”, reframes Stéphane Trichet from the start. This coach and company speaker thus describes common situations where stressed employees could lose their usual calm. ” Contrary to popular belief, stress is not only counterproductive and paralyzing: it is also a natural adaptation of the organism to a situation which can precisely lead to additional motivation. Example of a situation: an employee who is suddenly feverish, who doubts and manifests mood swings more or less pleasant for those around him. But this specialist is keen to distinguish this occasional stress from genuine chronic anxiety. “Sometimes you have to accept to work in a situation of moderate stress because you need a little excitement to be successful,” he explains. Up to a certain level, losing your temper allows you to be effective. ”
“When faced with someone losing their temper, it's tempting to step up and turn the incident into a conflict.”
2 When it's all the time and with everyone: YES
Certainly, but the coach agrees: everything is a question of measurement … “There is of course a level not to cross, continues Stéphane Trichet. Beyond a certain stage, stress really turns into anxiety. The employee can start to be tired, a prisoner of his emotions and poison the lives of his colleagues. »Classic situation: a regularly angry employee who unloads his emotions on those around him. “It is the manager's role to identify the first signs. Even if the employee notices it, he will often not dare to say anything for fear that it is interpreted as a sign of weakness. On the contrary, he will push as far as possible to see how far he can go. “” Losing your temper often means finding yourself in a situation of unease at work without necessarily being able to identify it., observes François Delpierre, head of the Occupational Risk Prevention division of the Securex firm. Among the classic symptoms: an employee who appears more and more tired and who adopts a negative, cynical, even feverish attitude. “Somewhere, this employee, perhaps close to burn-out, waves his arms to be heard. But if he does not notice it and if his manager does nothing, he risks depression if he does not consult … ”
3 When you let go with a benevolent manager: NO
Losing your temper, yes … but not with just anyone. “Losing your cool can be positive,” says Pascal Christin, coach at CSP Formation. If only the actors involved are able to take a step back from the situation. According to this company speaker, however, the exercise is delicate and requires two important conditions. “Ideally, the person concerned must already realize this and have enough lucidity to recognize his excesses. He may say to himself “I lost my temper but what exactly did I want to free myself from?” This expert insists on the liberating aspect of the situation. But the manager must still be alert and above all benevolent. “He must already know that someone who loses his temper releases his stress. Then, the manager is free to see the situation as a fault or a signal. Because when you lose your temper, it's because you often have no other way to show your moods. »Example of a delicate but liberating situation: an employee who insults his manager with a flowery vocabulary. “Ideally the manager should start by saying ‘Now that you've insulted me what do you really want to say to me?' By saying this, he breaks the emotional charge and engages in dialogue. This does not prevent, secondly, to recall that these words were unacceptable but to start again on a better basis. ”
4 If the manager reacts badly: YES
Except that not all managers will always be so well intentioned. “Even without wanting to harm the employee, many managers do not know how to do in this kind of situation and let the employee lock himself in his discomfort, recognizes François Delpierre. Many fail in their duty to listen, alert and question. Pascal Christin agrees. ” When faced with someone who loses their temper, it is often tempting to go overboard and turn the incident into a conflict.. »Another option: the Labor Code authorizes manager to be procedural, especially if the incident took place in front of witnesses. “An insult, isolated from its context, can be interpreted as a serious fault and cause the employee a warning or even dismissal. Sometimes losing your temper can be very costly. ”
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